Yup, it’s true. I pretty much feel like I’m way over my head every day.
I had these grandiose dreams of children with perfectly neat hair, clean clothes, great manners and loved to read and do quiet activities. I did not get that child. I have the child whose hair is always messy (despite pulling it into a ponytail at least 6 times a day), covers her face with berries and then rolls in the dirt then runs around the house attempting to climb everything.
I try and teach her manners, but she throws her food, hits, screams and is generally a giant tornado coming towards you at all times. Sometimes she’s quiet and stays still, but that’s usually because she’s plotting something…. Silence only leads to terrible things.
So what do I do? Seriously, I suck at this. Every time I scold her she laughs hysterically – if I yell, she laughs harder. Time outs? No problem, she’ll sit in a pack and play for a minute and when I ask her if she’s going to continue to hit mommy, she emphatically shakes her head and says yes.
It’s not easy. There are days when I’m ready to crawl under the covers and have a time out of my own. (I’m ashamed to admit, some days I do while she stands and screams at me). This parenting thing does not come easily to me – I look at my friend’s kids with decent manners and who are somewhat respectful (as much as a toddler can be) and think, they’re meant to be parents.
This week has been one of those weeks. Mini is sick, teething and just generally a non-napping mess. (Although, this blog is brought to you by a miraculous 2 hour nap) I seriously wonder why I’m doing this parenting thing. Yet, every time I start to question why I’m even a parent, especially since I swore for years that I never would be, she comes over and gives me the sweetest little kiss or dances around and sings her own little song which melts my heart and makes me want at least five more.
I have a sneaking suspicion that I’m not the only one who wants to run away some days (maybe not all the way away, just to Spa Utopia for a day). But it’s a tough thing to put out there – you feel like a failure.
So there. There’s my confession. I suck at parenting. Kind of, sort of, I'm hoping not really.